Don’t take me out to the ball game motherfucker

I'd be pissed if had to spend all night at Busch too.

I’ve come to point in my life where I hate going to baseball games. You wait in crowds of the dirty, smelly, intoxicated, unwashed masses to cram into seats surrounded by Cardinal fans, the most passive aggressive rude people in the baseball world. I feel like I’m being suffocated in filth. All while you bake and sweat  in the Saint Louis Humidity. Not to mention you drop a hundo every time you go there.

Don’t even get me started on Busch three. It’s a cathedral of consumerism designed to shake naïve fans out of their money and shove them out the gate. It has the ambiance and atmosphere of an airport. We act like it’s the end of the world if Matt fucking Holliday doesn’t hit with runners in scoring position, IT’S A GAME, no one’s going to die because the card’s lost and if you’re that upset about it, get a life. The Saint Louis Cardinals don’t give a fuck about you.

Think about sitting next to this guy.

There’s just something so corporate about baseball now, the purity, if there ever was any is long gone with shit like this. You can’t walk outside of the ballpark without someone hitting you up for a donation. SIDENOTE, why is it whenever I go to Walgreens the clerk is always hitting me up for a donation. I get them asking once, but not two or three times. If I have an extra buck it’s going to a family or friend, not some asshole I’ve never even met.

When Busch Two closed the Cardinals sold everything, including the urinals in the home team locker room and some dumb fucker bought it for over two thousand.  “Hey Bill do you think they’d buy a turd if we put a cardinal logo on it?”

My beef isn’t with the Cardinal Ownership, it’s with the fans.  It’s our own fault baseball and well professional sports in general is in this predicament. They continue to raise ticket prices. logo goddamn everything and we clap and buy whatever they sell. We're all buffoons. Modern day fans have done nothing to stop this, so why should the owners?

I suppose I’ll have to take my son their one day as a rite of passage. I’m not really looking to it. God forbid he stands up to block someone’s view and the Cardinal Faithful passively tell him to sit down.

Or grown people bringing signs to games, (like this winner) come one have a little respect for yourself and get naked to be on TV.

Best fans in baseball my ass, ask Mitchell Boggs, Tino Martinez and Albert Pujols about that.

I’m too young to be this cynical.